We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
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