Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
Randomize
