I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
Are we still banned from the library?
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
Randomize
