I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
I just found puke in my bra..
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Randomize