just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
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