On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
