This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
Randomize
