I think i sorta joined a cult last night
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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