So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
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