we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
