i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
Randomize
