shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
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