what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
Randomize
