they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
How drunk are you?
Completed.
Randomize
