i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
Randomize
