i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
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