So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
i opened her purse and found 4 bottles of vodka tampons and an unopened box of birth control...
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Randomize
