Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
