YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Randomize
