have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
Randomize
