i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
Randomize
