You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
My boss spotted an injured PIGEON outside the front door this morning (at 3:30am) and requested that I catch it and take it to the vet. Catch it with what! Take it where!These requests have gone too far...
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Randomize
