We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
We talked him into tasing himself.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
Randomize