Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
Randomize
