I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
I asked what it takes to be a good delivery driver, my new boss said "always keep these in your vehicle" as he handed me a flashlight and a blunt. I'm going to like this job.
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