Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
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