Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
apparently the secret to your success is patron
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
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