that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
Can you put "designated driver" on a resume?
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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