so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
Randomize
