My cat gives me a boner
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
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