Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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