i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
Brb crying the tears of my youth
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize
