i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
Randomize
