he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
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