his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
Randomize
