dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
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