i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
My ex's psycho new girlfriend found my vibrator I forgot at his place. Apparently she didn't find it as funny as I did. 😂
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
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