he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
Randomize
