well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
Randomize
