HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
