i was rollin on her like bob the builder
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
Randomize
