is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
Just drug him and when he wakes up be like "you just woke up from a coma, we've been married for the past five years." It'll be like the Vow but fucked up.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
