I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
Randomize
