I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
