in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
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