glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
My kid just put flowers in my hair to make me pretty, then showed my boobs to an entire playground. He's either the best wingman or the worst.
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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