Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
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