i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
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