yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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