I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
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