God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Randomize
