I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
I drank too much. My snot smells like vodka when I blow my nose.
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
