I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
my boobs are a 3G dead zone. as soon as i take my phone out of my bra, it has a signal again.
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
Why I hate online dating: not even one day in and a 57 year old asks me to call him "Daddy."
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Randomize